My healthy regime has totally gone to pieces.
It should not be an excuse but for the past month, I have been undergoing therapy for some awful experiences that happened to me back in my secondary school days. These incidents may have occurred over forty years ago but they have haunted me ever since. I have tried vainly to suppress these memories through heavy drinking, excessive exercise and binge eating that left me dangerously overweight but they have always been in my mind ready to strike at a moments notice.
Everything came to a head shortly before Christmas when I had a mini breakdown in front of my doctor. Suggestions were made and eventually I was put in touch with a wonderful Irish lady who is helping me come to terms with these awful events of my childhood. I may only see the therapist once a week for an hour but it is a time to get things off my chest and try to understand what happened to me between the ages of 11-14.
I have also decided to give evidence in London to The Truth Project which is the Independent Inquiry into Child Sex Abuse. I thought long and hard about this and after three weeks of sitting on the forms, I decided that this will serve two purposes. It will hopefully help prevent these things happening to other children in the future and it may enable to finally put these events behind me.
Anyway, that’s my excuse for letting things slip but as from today, I am right back on my regime as I will not let what happened to me in the past determine my future.
Wish me luck!